{"id":3651,"date":"2022-01-02T07:20:45","date_gmt":"2022-01-02T15:20:45","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/kpthrivingfamilies.org\/pediatricsblog\/?p=3651"},"modified":"2023-08-08T09:36:50","modified_gmt":"2023-08-08T16:36:50","slug":"is-my-child-depressed","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/kpthrivingfamilies.org\/pediatricsblog\/is-my-child-depressed\/","title":{"rendered":"Is My Child Depressed?"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>It\u2019s been so nice to see lots of kids in person again for their checkups as they head back to school and sports. While some kids are feeling excitement and relief these days, we\u2019ve also found that a lot of them are <a href=\"https:\/\/kpthrivingfamilies.org\/pediatricsblog\/is-your-child-feeling-anxious\/\">feeling anxious<\/a> and depressed. This has been a rough time for children and teens due to social isolation, remote learning, fewer social activities, and school services, and increased stress at home.<\/p>\n<p>Depression is persistent sadness or low mood and loss of interest that interferes with daily activities. While you might attribute this to your child \u201cgoing through a phase\u201d or having changing hormones, it may be depression. Depression lasts even after circumstances change for the better. Children with depression may:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Be irritable, angry, or just feel \u201cdown.\u201d<\/li>\n<li>Have a decline in school performance.<\/li>\n<li>Experience changes in appetite and sleep patterns.<\/li>\n<li>Be harsh on themselves (\u201cI\u2019m not smart. \u201cNo one wants to be my friend.\u201d)<\/li>\n<li>Have physical symptoms such as feeling tired and sluggish, complain of aches and pains, or have fears of falling ill.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>Parents can support children who are feeling depressed.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Check in with them often <\/strong><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Ask open-ended questions. \u201cHow did the day go?\u201d \u201cWhat\u2019s going on with school and friends?\u201d \u201cWhat was one good (and not-so-good) thing that happened today\u201d?<\/li>\n<li>If you notice something wrong, let them know. \u201cYou look upset and I\u2019m worried. What\u2019s going on?\u201d<\/li>\n<li>Model talking about feelings at home.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<ul>\n<li>Ask about <a href=\"https:\/\/kpthrivingfamilies.org\/pediatricsblog\/6-steps-to-keep-kids-safe-online\/\">their time online<\/a>. Are they doing homework, socializing, or spending hours browsing social media? Are they being treated well in their online interactions, or are there any signs of cyberbullying?<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><strong>Validate their feelings<\/strong><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>If they share what\u2019s going on, let them know it\u2019s normal to feel stressed, sad, discouraged, or overwhelmed from time to time.<\/li>\n<li>Ask, \u201cWill you let me know if there is anything I can do to help?\u201d<\/li>\n<li>Let them know you want to understand their perspective and experiences, and that they aren\u2019t going to get in trouble for sharing their feelings.<\/li>\n<li>You can use validating statements such as, \u201cI wish that hadn\u2019t happened.\u201d \u201cThat really sucks.\u201d<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><strong>Connect as a family.<\/strong><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Schedule regular fun plans with them, such as a family game or movie nights. Find safe ways of doing pre-pandemic activities and celebrating graduations, holidays, and birthdays.<\/li>\n<li>Get outdoors for walks \u2013 studies have shown that kids talk more with parents while walking together!<\/li>\n<li>Help schedule fun activities with their friends on and offline.<\/li>\n<li>Make sure your children eat balanced meals, get enough sleep, and get their share of daily exercise.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>When talking with your kids there are a few pitfalls you can stumble into.<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Children do not always understand why they feel the way they do. Asking them \u201cWhy do you feel sad\/mad\/angry?\u201d can place pressure on them and not make them feel supported.<\/li>\n<li>Avoid asking \u201cWhy\u201d questions.\u00a0 This can sound like you are blaming them.<\/li>\n<li>Do not try to \u201cfix\u201d things for your child unless explicitly asked to do so. Statements such as \u201cWell, did you try\u2026?\u201d or \u201cIt sounds like you need to\u2026\u201d can backfire. Instead, ask first \u201cWould you like a suggestion or my help?\u201d<\/li>\n<li>Reassurance isn\u2019t always supportive or validating. \u201cOh, don\u2019t worry. It\u2019ll be fine,\u201d may not be what your children need to hear. Instead, validate that you understand their feelings and that it\u2019s okay to feel that way.<\/li>\n<li>Let older children and teens know you are there for them to talk, to but accept requests for space. Invite them to join family activities, but don\u2019t force them to join in.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><strong>If they disclose self-harm or suicidal thoughts:<\/strong><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Ask for clarification. \u201cI take your thoughts and feelings very seriously. When you said you wanted to hurt yourself, did you have a plan for how and when you may want to do that? Have you already done anything to hurt yourself?\u201d<\/li>\n<li>If they express the desire to hurt or kill themselves, call 911 or take them to the nearest ER.<\/li>\n<li>Remove all sharps, guns, or things your child could use for self-harm in the home environment. Lock up medications.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n<p><strong>Resources for Parents<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/suicidepreventionlifeline.org\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">National Suicide Prevention Lifeline<\/a>: 1-800-273-8255<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.imalive.org\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Youth America Hotline<\/a>, Counseling for Teens by Teens: 1-877-968-8454<\/p>\n<p>National Domestic Violence Hotline 1-800-799-7233<\/p>\n<p>National Teen Dating Abuse Helpline 1-866-331-9474.<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/about.kaiserpermanente.org\/community-health\/improving-community-conditions\/family-violence-prevention-program\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Kaiser Permanente Family Violence Prevention Program<\/a><\/p>\n<p><strong>My Doctor Online<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/mydoctor.kaiserpermanente.org\/ncal\/Images\/Teen%20Depression-%20What%20Teens%20and%20Parents%20Need%20to%20know%20(90594)_tcm75-14719.pdf\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Teen Depression<\/a><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/mydoctor.kaiserpermanente.org\/ncal\/video\/talk-with-your-teen-1600540\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Talk with Your Teen<\/a><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/mydoctor.kaiserpermanente.org\/ncal\/structured-content\/#\/Condition_Stress.xml\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Stress<\/a><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/mydoctor.kaiserpermanente.org\/ncal\/structured-content\/#\/Condition_Stress_Management_for_Parents_of_Teens_-_Pediatrics.xml\">Helping Your Teen Manage Stress<\/a><\/p>\n<p><strong>The American Academy of Pediatrics<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.healthychildren.org\/English\/health-issues\/conditions\/emotional-problems\/Pages\/Anxiety-Disorders.aspx\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Anxiety in Teens is Rising: What\u2019s Going On?<\/a><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.healthychildren.org\/English\/family-life\/Media\/Pages\/Cyberbullying.aspx?_gl=1*10fm576*_ga*MzM4ODg5NDkxLjE2MjUzMzY1NDM.*_ga_FD9D3XZVQQ*MTYyODcxNzE4MS4yLjEuMTYyODcxNzI1OC4w&amp;_ga=2.146863863.177712833.1628717181-338889491.1625336543\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Cyberbullying<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Depression is persistent sadness or low mood and loss of interest that interferes with daily activities. While you might attribute this to your child \u201cgoing through a phase\u201d or having changing hormones, it may be depression. Depression lasts even after circumstances change for the better.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":8,"featured_media":3655,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[454],"tags":[651,576,611,295,567,392,72],"class_list":["post-3651","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-behavior","tag-depression","tag-stress","tag-suicide-prevention","tag-talking-with-kids","tag-talking-with-teens","tag-teenagers-and-independence","tag-teens","ages-all-school-ages"],"metadata":{"_edit_lock":["1691512611:8"],"_edit_last":["8"],"slide_template":[""],"ase_chapter_enable_timeline":["off"],"video_format_choose":["youtube"],"_yoast_wpseo_content_score":["60"],"_yoast_wpseo_estimated-reading-time-minutes":["4"],"qode_animate-page-title":["no"],"qode_show-page-title-text":["no"],"qode_show-page-title-image":["no"],"qode_show-sidebar":["default"],"qode_hide-featured-image":["no"],"_yoast_wpseo_primary_category":["454"],"_yoast_wpseo_primary_ages":["293"],"_thumbnail_id":["3655"],"post_featured_author_bio":["Dr. Padmaja Padalkar's bio states: &quot;One of the primary factors that influenced my decision to be involved in the primary care of children and adolescents was my potential to practice preventive medicine, i.e., influence parents and children to lead healthier lifestyles, especially in these busy times. From birth to adolescence, routine well-care visits and immunizations play an important role in the prevention and early detection of disease in children. This was also a major factor in my decision to work at Kaiser Permanente, an organization that has over the past several decades lead the way in providing comprehensive medical care by optimally integrating preventive and curative medicine.&quot; Dr. Padalkar's biography can be found on {{My Doctor Online}}."],"post_featured_author_bio_link":["https:\/\/mydoctor.kaiserpermanente.org\/ncal\/providers\/padmajapadalkar"],"post_featured_author_image":["https:\/\/kpthrivingfamilies.org\/pediatricsblog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/07\/Padmaja-Padalkar-002.png"],"post_featured_author_role":["YES"],"wpfp_favorites":["6"],"_wpb_vc_js_status":["false"],"ase_map_component_start_point":["a:2:{s:3:\"lat\";d:29.76;s:3:\"lng\";d:-95.38;}"],"_yoast_indexnow_last_ping":["1691512610"]},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/kpthrivingfamilies.org\/pediatricsblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3651","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/kpthrivingfamilies.org\/pediatricsblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/kpthrivingfamilies.org\/pediatricsblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kpthrivingfamilies.org\/pediatricsblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/8"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kpthrivingfamilies.org\/pediatricsblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=3651"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"https:\/\/kpthrivingfamilies.org\/pediatricsblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3651\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3734,"href":"https:\/\/kpthrivingfamilies.org\/pediatricsblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3651\/revisions\/3734"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kpthrivingfamilies.org\/pediatricsblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/3655"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/kpthrivingfamilies.org\/pediatricsblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=3651"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kpthrivingfamilies.org\/pediatricsblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=3651"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kpthrivingfamilies.org\/pediatricsblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=3651"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}