Why do I love working with kids? Well, that\u2019s an easy one \u2013 they make me smile every day. It\u2019s a great way to work \u2013 surrounded by kids saying the craziest things! Here are my top 10 funniest patients of the year:<\/p>\n
1.\u00a0\u00a0As I sent a 5-year-old girl to get an X-ray, she said she\u2019d been there before: \u201cThat’s where mom goes to get her boobs smashed!\u201d
\n2.\u00a0\u00a0A 5-year-old boy with a wart on his finger was brave enough to let me freeze the wart off with liquid nitrogen, something that kids twice his age are often too scared to let me do. He said that it was fun \u2013 just like \u201csnowman kisses!\u201d
\n3.\u00a0\u00a0I asked my 6-year-old patient, \u201cWhat do you want to be when you grow up?\u201d He said, \u201cA dinosaur.\u201d I asked, \u201cMeat or plant eating?\u201d He looked at me as if I was nuts and said, \u201cDefinitely meat! What\u2019s life without bacon?\u201d Well, he might have a point!
\n4.\u00a0\u00a0A 3-year-old girl asked me as I walked in the room, \u201cWhere are YOUR parents?\u201d
\n5.\u00a0\u00a0Another 3-year-old girl walked into my office, looked around and disappointedly said, “Where are the paints?”
\n6.\u00a0\u00a0A 6-year-old boy was watching a little girl doing show and tell at school when he started feeling sick, so his mom took him to see me. He was having trouble telling me how he felt (nauseated? hard to breathe? dizzy?) so I talked to his mom to try to understand. Meanwhile the boy was\u00a0drawing with my crayons on the exam table paper then tugged on my sleeve and pointed to his picture of an emoji with heart eyes. \u201cThat\u2019s how I felt, Dr. Land!\u201d
\n7.\u00a0\u00a0After I walked a 9-year-old boy out to the stickers box to choose one, he seemed disappointed. He looked up at his mom and said, \u201cI thought she said Snickers!”
\n8.\u00a0\u00a0A 9-year-old told me, \u201cWhen I was young, I wanted to be a doctor.\u201d I asked him, \u201cNow what do you want to be?\u201d \u201cAn artist! Drawing is way more fun!\u201d\u00a0Hmmmm.
\n9.\u00a0\u00a0A 6-year-old was studying me intently as I talked with his mom. After a bit he blurted out, \u201cYou have a lot more grey hair than the last time I saw you.\u201d
\n10. \u00a0A 6-year-old boy was missing a front tooth. I said jokingly, \u201cWhere\u2019d your tooth go?\u201d He said, \u201cIt came out.\u201d So I said (expecting the usual tooth fairy story), \u201cWhat did you do with it?\u201d\u00a0\u201cSold it on eBay.\u201d \u201cSeriously?\u201d \u201cYup.\u201d And, his dad confirmed this!<\/p>\n
Now, I ask you\u00a0\u2013\u00a0why would I do anything else? #Ilovemyjob.<\/p>\n